Here's the latest in blog news and views. All the news thats fit to eat.

I found an interesting blog today called Double Life. I didn't read too much, but he takes pictures of random girls that he sees at college and posts them. Reminded me of my pain, but I don't think this guy is having the same trauma that I had in college.

There is an interesting contest going on over at On The Prowl. I'm not taking part, but I encourage all of you freaks to pull it out, and send her a pic.

I've posted some new Blog links off to the left. Hey Ari And Amber, hook me up with a link, I'm drowning over here!

I linked to ...Drunk In A Midnight Choir, the second page to which I've linked that has "drunk" in the title. He left a comment. He has some good stuff on his page. Basically, anybody who makes hooker jokes is alright by me.

I linked to some fellow at Am I Invisible Or What. I'm invisible at his page. Oh well.

Finally, mad props to Mr. Stone and his Not With You But Your Words site. He's a faithful commentator (thats what I call people who leave comments) on this site. Yo dog, I have to find some time to read your ish. I've heard good things.

I used to be linked over at American Diatribe. Her site started off as a simple Blogger blog, with a Blogger template. But now its totally Blog-riffic. I hope my recent string of vicious posts hasn't turned her off. Damn....

Peace Out.

Starting on Wednesday, I will have to pay mortgages on two houses. Also starting on Wednesday is the infamous "liberal radio network", Air America.

Al Franken has a show. He's usually pretty funny, so it should be decent. Janeane Garofalo also has a show, which I'm not so sure about. Something about her attitude bugs me.

At any rate, I'm going to try it out. Supposedly you can listen to them through the web. Thats the only way I CAN hear it, because no stations in Pittsbutt, PA are broadcasting it.

Its a little weird to start a liberal network. Its a somewhat contrived notion to create a deliberately biased network of radio programming to be an alternative to deliberately biased radio programming.

I think Rush Limbaugh arose in a more-or-less typical radio personality sort of way; starting off as a small, yet fat nobody and ending up a big and fat somebody and then a big and thin drug addicted somebody. However, a lot of the followers, like Mike Reagan, Drudge, and Savage were probably pretty contrived. And certainly, O'Reilly, simply put his Fox TV show on the radio. Big whoop.

If it works, I think it would be good though. I don't generally like political rhetoric, and I certainly dislike propaganda. However, if this liberal network can be funny and relatively insightful, then I think it will be a good alternative.

I know that "Conservatives" say they need their radio people because the entire "media" is liberal. I won't even address the validity of that nonsense. Lets face it, any news that doesn't conform with "conservative" opinion, is considered biased and "liberal" (actually the same thing). So I would argue that liberal viewpoints are no better represented in the major news outlets (network TV news, CNN, MSNBC, Wash Post, NY Times, USA Today, etc...) than conservative viewpoints.

So, what the hell?

I'm sure this isn't a problem, right?

Rapid growth of "dead zones" in oceans threatens planet

I mean, surely George Bush and God can get together and fix this.

Are any of you people out there "Average"? Would any of you admit if you were?

I've been wondering lately what it would be like to be normal(?). Or, what is it like to be an average person. I don't want to get into the whole business of whether such a thing as "average" exists. Of course, everyone is different in one way or another, but for the sake of argument, lets just say that there is a continuum of human traits, such that one can fall more in the middle, and be "average", or further out on the edges, and thus not be "average".

For instance, why is it that most people seem to not be concerned about their intellectual development? I consider this to be an "average" trait. Why do so many people believe in the religion they were brought up with? Why do so many people think and say completely irrational things (according to basic principles of logic), and not know or care (if they know)? Why do so few people have any imagination, creativity, or ingenuity? Am I the only one?

Look, I'm not running around saying I'm some sort of genius or god-like person, but I know what I am and I know what I'm not.

Why is it that so many people think that what they "feel" is the truth? In other words, if they feel something strongly, then it must be an accurate reflection of how things really ARE. And then they act accordingly.

There are people in this world that I find absolutely confounding in their stupidity and ignorance. I tend to think there is something "wrong" with them. However, it has dawned on me that perhaps I have no way of knowing if they are "wrong" because the sample population I compare them to is me and my choice of friends. Throughout my life, I've made a point of choosing friends that seemed to have above-average intelligence and talent. I've deliberately avoided "average people". Consequently, I don't actually know what they are like. So when I get pissed off at someone for saying or doing something ridiculous, maybe they are just being normal.

I think that I fall somewhere apart from the the majority of people, but probably not too far. I'm no Mozart or Stephen Hawkings. So lets keep that straight. And I'm terrible at math!

At any rate, I find it all very confusing. Maybe someday I'll figure it out, but I doubt it.

I really think that being with one person for a long time, especially for the rest of your life is unrealistic. I just don't think we humans were built that way. Not I only do I not THINK it, but there is plenty of evidence to support my claim, of which I will provide none.

Soon, I'll be entering a world I was never that sure I wanted to enter. Being a father, husband, etc... was something I had some serious doubts about; whether I'd like it, whether I could do it, whether it was even an option. Well, apparently WAS and IS an option because its happening. All of which means, among other things, that my opportunities for sexual variety are over. I know that some people have open marriages and whatnot, but that wouldn't work for me. So thats that.

So, why will I not cheat? I mean, why won't I? Here are the Top 10 Reason I Won't Cheat:

1. I don't want to hurt the person I'm with
2. If I was not with her, it's quite possible I'd never have sex again anyway.
3. It's too much work and I'm lazy.
4. I would probably have a panic attack over it.
5. I'm overweight.
6. You have to be pretty psychologically together to sustain it. I'm not that together.
7. I probably wouldn't enjoy it.
8. Losing my soon-to-be-wife and child would be awful.
9. I'd probably get a sexually transmitted disease.
10. I'm just as unpopular with the ladies as I am with the gents.

So, thats how it goes. I'd really like for someone invent a Monogamy Pill. Something that would induce people to only have urges for one person. That would make life a lot easier.

God, Its Me, An Ant In A Hailstorm. And I hate the mall!

The mall and I have had a contentious relationship through the years. My opinion on The Mall has changed so often that I can barely keep it straight. Currently, I hate the mall.

1971-1983: I liked the mall. The mall had fountains, video games, food, toys. What's not to like?

1984-1990: I hated the mall. All those yucky teens and trendy types going to all those silly mall stores. Yuck!

1990-1997: I sort of liked the mall again. The food court, the easy shopping, etc...

1998-2004: I hate the mall. Its like going back to seventh grade. Ugh...

I'm not going to mess around. The reason I hate the mall now is because of "girls". All of the girls are young and hot! Jesus Christ, don't ugly people ever go anywhere?! Rather, don't they ever go to the mall? These girls walk around in outfits that say "Fuck Me"! Tight pants that barely cover the ass, belly shirts, low necklines, enormous boobs. Oh crap. Its too much. Every direction, "I want to fuck her. No stop!", then "Oh, I want to fuck her too. NOOO!" Its a goddamn hell for the sexually dysfunctional and/or immature, of which I include myself.

And all of those girls are VERY young. I mean, these are teenagers. And they are stupid too. I don't have a problem with the fact that I'm attracted to teens. Hell, millions of years of evolution fine-tuned me to be attracted to teens! The problem is the absurdity of all of it. I can't have sex with them! And it has nothing to do with having a girlfriend/soon-to-be-wife. Even if I didn't have anyone, I wouldn't be having sex with them. First there is the illegality of it. Then there is the whole "I'm fat and ugly" thing. Then there is the whole issue of actually dealing with those girls as human beings. Lord knows I don't want to put up with that.

Oh, so why else do I hate the mall? Well, I hate the stores again. They all seem to say, "You're not good enough. Buy our clothes, and maybe you'll be good. But probably not". God, there is Hot Topic, Abercrombie, and I don't know what else, but its awful.

And even the food court is a huge let down. Its too expensive for one thing. And I just can't understand why mall Chinese Food can't get it right. Why is it so hard to make decent Chinese food in a mall?

The only good thing about the mall these days is Auntie Anne's Pretzels. Damn, I could eat three or four of those things in one sitting. Holy hell, are they good. Those pretzels are almost a reason to put up with the mall.

// posted by Ant In A Hailstorm @ 3/26/2004 09:36:00 AM

Its going to be a happy sunny place over here at my site today... No, don't go away!!!

My old buddy Dan, published a nice piece of work over at his site about things that make him feel good. Hey Dan, you should've included your hand in that list! He also gives a shout out to one my new reasons for living, Dave Chappelle.

My last post was positively toxic. Perhaps that is how it should be for a misanthrope such as myself. After all, this site isn't called "Ant On A Sunny Day". Nevertheless, for a change, here are some good things; things I'm happy about, etc...

1. I'm going to have a baby boy in three months. Yep, it makes me happy.
2. I don't work for a capitalist organization.
3. Super Furry Animals
4. Remastered versions of Fleetwood Mac, Rumours, and Tusk by Fleetwood Mac.
5. A new album by Crosby-Nash this year.
6. Chappelle's Show.
7. A new season of The Sopranos.
8. Thai food.
9. Presidential term limits.
10. A nice good sleep.

That being said, I really cannot endorse Dan's support of the Flaming Lips. I've tried. I really HAVE tried. I have their last album, and its okay. Then I got the previous one, and I realized once again, that I can't stand that guy's voice. Ultimately its all because of their "hit" in 1994 or so, "She Don't Eat Jelly". I simply hated that song and I couldn't stand the vocal. So even though their music is pretty interesting, I can't dig it. Perhaps instrumentals would be nice, or if someone else sang the songs.

The very same thing could have happened with The High Llamas. Sean O'Hagen doesn't sing very well. And his voice is somewhat whiny and moderately grating (but in a British way). However, the High Llamas never had an annoying MTV hit, so they weren't ruined for me.

More negativity and piss tomorrow folks!

The war on gay terrorists. Keep it coming. Everything is fine. Nothing to worry about here.

Did anybody see this story: Report Says Medicare to Go Broke by 2019? Basically, there won't be enough money to keep the program viable given current projections (projected costs vs. projected funding). For you workers out there, take a look at your pay stub some day, and see how much of your pay goes to Medicare. This is money that will supposedly be available to you when you retire or if you get attacked by a terrorist and don't die.

I don't see this issue as a 'blame game' issue. I don't think either Democrats or Republicans have been more or less responsible regarding Medicare. Opportunities to "fix the problem" have been squandered over the years for one reason or another. Some people actually think that Republican leaders have a desire to destroy the program. Some probably do, but I don't think that too many Republican Medicare recipients feel the same way. But that isn't what the subject of this post is actually about.

See, this Medicare problem is some serious shit. Perhaps we'll have some crazy economic boom between then and now and the coffers will be filled with excess revenue from all of our bulging paychecks. Or maybe not. What if that doesn't happen? What happens to all of the Medicare deductions in our paychecks? Do we get them back? I'm sure that we'll want that money back, considering that it's OUR money. I certainly don't mind paying taxes if the government service is provided, but if Medicare goes broke, then what?

Meanwhile, our President has determined that gay people marrying requires a Constitutional Amendment. Of course, HE doesn't have a CLUE as to how to "fix" Medicare. Maybe someone in his administration has some ideas that aren't stupid, but I doubt it (see previous post). However, he and his people DO know how to procure weaponry, and attack countries that pose no threat to us. We have a "war on terrorism" which dominates everything in this country, even though only 3,000 people were killed by terrorists . Losing Medicare only impacts every taxpayer in the country. Why would George W. Bush care about that? I mean, why WOULD he?!

Did you know that in 2002 nearly 17,500 people were killed as a result of drunk driving accidents?! - Where is the "War On Drunk Driving" or the "War On Booze"? Too bad they can't attack it with carpet bombing. I wonder how many times President Bush drove while drunk before he found religion? At least one time that we know about.

So what is worse? A drunk driver or a terrorist? At least a terrorist has a political purpose. Drunk drivers kill people randomly, for no reason whatsoever, and in far greater numbers. Oh well...

So the next time you hear these assholes going on about the evils of gay people getting married, or abortion, or the "impending threat" that Saddam Hussein posed, and how terrorism lurks everywhere, please be angry. Maybe our "freedoms" ARE being protected (I mean, I'm just saying), but we're going to be a sorry lot of sick, cancer-ridden fuckers in another 30 or 40 years. At least we'll be "free" to die in accidents involving drunk drivers in the meantime.

I wish I had made this up.

While visiting England, George Bush is invited to tea with the Queen. He asks her what her leadership philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people.

Bush asks how she knows if they're intelligent.

"I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen. "Allow me to demonstrate."

Bush watches as the Queen phones Tony Blair and says, "Mr. Prime Minister, please answer this question: your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"

Tony Blair responds, "It's me, ma'am."

"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Queen. She hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?"

Bush nods: "Yes ma'am. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!"

Bush, upon returning to Washington, decides he'd better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. Bush summons Jesse Helms to the White House and says, "Senator Helms, I wonder if you can answer a question for me."

"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?"

Bush poses the question: "Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Helms hems and haws and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?"

Bush agrees, and Helms leaves. He immediately calls a meeting of other senior Republican senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin Powell at the State Department and explains his problem.

"Now lookee here, son, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course."

Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House, finds George Bush, and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It's Colin Powell!"

And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, you dumb sh*t, it's Tony Blair!"

Why "The Prom"? I'm nearly 33, after all. Look at all those happy people at their prom. Are any of them me? Are any of them six hours from having a nervous breakdown? No? Then, none of those people are me.

Why "The Prom" indeed. I was sitting by myself at Wendy's yesterday when I heard my name, "Dave". I didn't look because due to the popularity of my name (especially among 28-35 year olds), and my own "unpopularity", I have trained myself to not respond to my own name.

However, this time there was a person standing a few feet away, from where the sound of name originated. So, I looked. And it was a woman with a baby, and another kid. And she knew me, but I sure didn't know her. Then she said, "Its Gretchen. Gretchen Fayflee." (name changed to protect the innocent). What? Oh... the girl with whom I went to the prom, on May 26 1989, the third worst day of my life. Oh...

We chatted a bit. She explained that both of her parents recently died of cancer and she was living in their house. And she was married to this guy that played in Little League with me. (God, he was such an asshole). Some other person she knew died of Melanoma. Jesus. The only person she knew from back in the day was my ex-girlfriend, but they lost touch. I didn't volunteer any updates.

My prom story is a gruelling piece of maudlin crap; totally inferior WB teen drama outtake kinda shit. I won't go into it. The basic premise was that:

I didn't want to go

I did go

The girl I liked went with a guy I hated

I went with someone I didn't like (and sat at a table with my future ex-girlfriend of 14 years later)

At 1:30 AM, I began to have a panic attack that resulted in 3 hours of sobbing.

So, this woman I ran into at Wendy's was a small part of that. We didn't talk about the prom. I did mention that she was my date, but that was the end of it. I basically ditched her (not that she cared) at around 1:30 AM when I made up an excuse to get the hell out of there. I'm pretty sure I never talked to Gretchen again. For some reason I felt weird about that; even 15 years later. Prom... Why does society force these things on us anyway?

Okay, I probably shouldn't dismiss every ceremonial rite of passage just because I was (maybe still am) a huge fuckup and an emotional basketcase.

Yeah, I'm probably way off on this one too. I did a quick search on the word "Prom" and found thousands of blogs and web pages with pictures and bullshit. Obviously, SOME people love that shit. Well, screw them. Besides, there are people dying all over the world everyday.

// posted by Ant In A Hailstorm @ 3/22/2004 04:26:00 PM

I realized the other day that "suck my dick" is one of the most versatile, yet confounding phrases in the English language.

Ever notice how I always "realize" things "the other day". I think this is a writing crutch to introduce various topics. I'm going to have to come up with something better.

Here are the following social circumstances when you can utter "suck my dick":

When other drivers irritate you

When someone insults you

Whenever you don't get your way

When you are getting sexy with your lady

Okay, I'm already sick of this. My point is that sometimes you say it as an insult to someone you hate or who pisses you off. And other times you say it to someone you like or love. See? Obviously, on the one hand it is something degrading, which is why when we get pissed off at someone we tell them to suck it. However, what does it mean then, if someone you love actually DOES suck it? Is that degrading?

Next topic: The Pope's penis. Is it really big?

I don't even know how to express my opinions on Courtney Love. She is quite obviously suffering from a mental illness. I can't tell which one, so I won't even guess. My problem is that I don't think I should be making fun of the mentally ill. Yes, Courtney Love is an Asshole. But she's... an "American Asshole". No, I'm sorry. I mean, she's suffering from a mental illness.

Still... she isn't being treated. Or if she IS being treated, it isn't working. AND, to make it worse, she is running all over the place trying to promote her newest half-baked piece of shit cd. So we get to see a lot of her. So, in my book, that probably makes her 55% fair game for ridicule, and 45% deserving of our empathy, sympathy, and pity. In this post, I'm going to focus on the former!

If you listen to Courtney Love talk, you might think that she's a "strong-willed", "successful", "female", "artist" in a man's industry. I'm not hear to say you're wrong. If you don't get it by now, you never will. I would counter, however, that she is more along the lines of a "maniacal", "never-has-been", "?", "media whore" in a man's industry.

She wouldn't be "famous" if Kurt Cobain hadn't married her. Curse him! She probably also wouldn't be nearly as crazy if she had never met Cobain. But thats subject to debate. I mean, who really KNOWS?!

Who was it that said that Courtney Love was "three miles of bad road"? Possibly Dave Grohl. I'm not sure. It doesn't matter though. We all know what it means. She is the famous equivalent of your average late 30's, mentally ill woman, that lives in an institution. Only she's, well... "famous". She has enough money to stay out of the mental hospital. Although, she may not be able to avoid prison: Courtney Love Arrested on Assault Charge in NYC.

Oh, and what about her poor daughter, "Frances Bean", that she is deluded enough to think she should have custody of. God, someone should start raising money for HER psychiatric care. If George Bush can raise $1 million dollars at a dinner, shouldn't the rock and roll community be able to raise at least a couple hundred thousand dollars for poor Frances Bean? Perhaps some sort of "Bean-Aid"?

I'm sure I'm not the first (nor the last) to think and say this, but don't you sometimes think that, given Courtney's behavior, Cobain was possibly in his right mind ten years ago?

See the picture on the left? This picture started showing up on billboards all around Pittsburgh, right before Christmas. Here, take a look at the full ad: Another Satisfied Customer. I probably drove past it a dozen or so times before I realized what it was. Holy shit, its a billboard advertisement for jewelry.

If you haven't already taken a look at the full ad, please do so now. Do you see what this advertisement is trying to say? The snotty woman crying? Oh my god! She received the gift of jewelry and it brought her to tears. TEARS!

The company in question is Henne Jewelers, which has been in Pittsburgh since 1887, believe it or not. Yes, that's "18".

Honestly, I never took any notice of them until I saw this offensive billboard. So now I know where NOT to buy jewelry if I ever lose my mind and decide I need to buy some. I mean, Jesus Christ, LOOK at that awful lady. Look. Its horrible! Stop! Look away before your face turns to stone.

Okay, so lets quickly analyze this piece of advertising feces. The woman in the ad has obviously received some piece of jewelry, and is so moved that she was brought to tears. Thus, she is a "satisfied customer". Hmm... why would this make her cry? Why would jewelry do this to her? Ah, the underlying subtext, "My husband/significant other loves me. If you husband loves YOU, he'd be buying you some jewelry!". But is that true? I mean, really?! I guess that makes up for all of the other bullshit he does. "You are willing to spend an obscene amount of money on something that has no relevance whatsoever. You must love me".

If someone can give me an answer to why women like jewelry, especially thats of the expensive variety, I'd really be quite appreciative. I just don't get it. I can understand nice homemade jewelry or beads and what have you, but "fine" jewelry?! Its a fucking rock. Compressed minerals! It means nothing. Anyone can go into a store and buy it. Okay, not anyone! Anyone that makes over $200,000 a year can buy jewelry of this nature. Anyone that is filthy rich can bribe his woman with jewels mined by slaves.

My theory is that the diamond is an investment. By giving it to the woman, the man is saying, "I am making a commitment, and I am so committed, that I will give you this expensive thing. Thus, if I left you, I'd be leaving you with the expensive thing. So I probably won't leave". Over the years, this reasoning (lie) has become mixed up with advertising (thank you DeBeers) and fairy tales, and now its a divine right that any woman that is loved will get some diamonds and jewelry. Or else, the man doesn't love her. Is two months salary too much to spend on something that last forever? Uh... yeah.

Possibly the most offensive part of this advertising is the actual woman. Is she not the "shrew-iest" looking woman you've ever seen? Oh lord, look at her long flat nose, and the heavy mascara around her eyes, and her severe eyebrows. This woman scares me. What man would put up with this horror?!

Speaking of which, I wonder what the man gets in return? Does he get to fart in bed? Does he get to sit around in his underwear? Does he get to fuck other women? Does he get to sit around on weekends and watch sports? Does he get to buy all sorts of crap for himself that she has no interest in? CD's, porn, DVD's, speakers, after market sound system in his car? I mean, WHAT does the man get?!!!

Holy, shit! What do we have here?!

I went to my bank about a month ago, and saw a massive poster of that fish-looking fucker to the left hanging behind the tellers. God, I thought it was innocuous the first time. WHAT was I thinking?! The next time I went the bank, I noticed that platypus-looking shithead again, and that time, I read the ad.

Don't Miss The Opportunity Of A Lifetime!
I won't type out the full text. Take a look at the actual ad. See, its all about getting money to send you kids to college, or retire, or take a vacation. I really couldn't tell what exactly it was about beyond that. And then there is some "sweepstakes" tied in. Okay, but it DOESN'T MATTER! Somebody please tell me what that fish looking fucker has to do with it?!

Oh yes, I am confused. Not only confused about the point of the advertisement, but whether or not this dick (take a nice long disturbing look) looks more like a platypus or a northern pike!

Oh my GOD! I can't take it! What does THAT guy have to do with putting your kids in college, retiring, vacationing, or buying a new house? So is he some type of financial planner?! That can't be right! He's obviously WAY to young to be trusted with MY money, and I'm only 32. There is no way an actual adult (must be over 40) would allow a schmuch like that guy, with a haircut like that to manage their money. So that can't be it.

So, is he a college kid? Maybe he's some kid that the lucky sweepstakes winner is going put through college. But then why is the guy in a suit? College kids don't wear suits! And he's obviously too old to be just going to college now.

And what is going on with that snide look on his face. Look at it again. The look on that monkey asshole's face is one of sheer idiocy. Is it a serious look? A confused look? God, I hope he isn't trying to be sexy!

Ugh... what does any of it have to do with the text below? How can advertising agencies and the companies that big money for their services be so stupid?!

Trust me, this isn't over by a long shot! I fully intend to call PNC Bank and get to the bottom of this. I'm going to find someone who can explain this to me if it kills me. If stuff like this can be allowed to exist, than none of us have any hope. The world is truly doomed

Now its time to laugh.
Whitney Houston has checked into drug rehab. Ha Ha Ha....

Why the hatred of Whitney Houston? Hmm... it started way back in the eighties, not too long after she came out. Her first couple of songs were innocuous enough. I mean, they were bad, but I didn't really think she'd be around for too long, so I didn't take much notice. Then she had a second album, and it had the song "I Wanna Dance With Somebody Who Loves Me". I remember the video like it was yesterday. Whitney was in a revealing top, dancing around, pushing guys away from her because clearly she was so desirable. The smug look on her face, and the ridiculous premise of the song made me realize that she was most likely evil. Not as evil as Madonna, but evil, nonetheless.

Oh! Wanna dance with somebody
I wanna feel the heat with somebody
Yeah! Wanna dance with somebody
With somebody who loves me

Then we have this gem:

I need a man who'll take a chance
On a love that burns hot enough to last
So when the night falls
My lonely heart calls

I guess she was referring to her future abusive husband, Bobby Brown. Wow, she sure did pick a winner with him. I'm sure that aside from the beatings and drug addiction, he's a great guy.

What other infractions has she committed? Here are a few:

Her rendition of Dolly Parton's "I-I-I-I-I Will Always Be Histrionic"

The movie "The Bodyguard"

Almost every other song she had done

Her reveling in the "diva" image. Screw her.

Her lame-ass drug addiction

The album cover for her greatest hits. Look at that! She is laughing, as she stands on a ladder with a drill, hanging another one of her thousand platinum crappy records. And her fans tolerate this?! Those idiots bought all those albums, and she puts an album cover out where she is gloating in it? "Oh, I'm so famous. Look at me. But I'm normal too! I stand on ladders, and hang up my platinum albums by myself". She can suck it.

She's also a raving idiot, as evidenced by her claim that "prayer" had gotten her off drugs:

"Houston, 40, admitted in a December 2002 television that she had abused drugs in the past, but told interviewer Diane Sawyer on ABC's "Primetime" that she had gotten beyond that time through prayer".

Oh well, so much for prayer. Actually, that is funny for a couple reasons. First, there is the whole "prayer" thing. "Oh God, I love you sooo much, and Jesus too. Please help me to stop using crack. I love it so much though! Isn't there some way you could fix it so that crack was good for me, "Whitney Houston". Oh heck, make it good for everyone!" Second, she ACTUALLY made this statement on TV! She had "gotten beyond the time". Oh really? I guess not. Maybe she should pray more. Maybe she prayed to the wrong God. Maybe she should pray to Betty Ford (who is still alive, and actually exists... nevermind).

So now she's in rehab, which basically means nothing. She may get better or may not. Most likely she won't. Ha. She'll do another round of talk shows when she gets out, using plenty of soft-focus camera shots. And she'll probably make another crappy album that she can plug. Hoo-ray....

Addendum:
Some frequent readers may notice that while I'm happy that Whitney Houston is still on drugs, and that I hope for her to fail, not too long ago, I posted that I hope David Crosby gets off of his pot arrest. Yes, its quite a contradiction. But see, I hate Whitney Houston, and I LIKE David Crosby. I never said this was logical!

// posted by Ant In A Hailstorm @ 3/16/2004 11:32:00 AM

I'm not Ward Cleaver. I'm really not. No, seriously!

I'm 32. I'm still clinging to that, even though I have it for only 9 more days. Screw it. Nevertheless, I'm relatively young. However, I'm now in the position of being a step-parent to a 13 year old. Consequently, I have to ACT the part. Do you know what this means?

It means no swearing, no sick jokes about molesting, not saying any old thing that pops into my head just because I think its funny. I have to hide this webpage from the kid using NetNanny(!).

Not only that, but the kid has some problems, so I can't even be a lame ol' do-nothing kind of father. I have to be engaged. I have to read about "parenting". I have to strategize about parenting! Do you hear me? Long time friends?! Any of you still out there? Do you hear me? I have given the kid "chores" that he has to do. And I have to remind him to do the chores. And I give him an allowance (also known as "payoffs"). Can't you see how un-rock 'n' roll that is?!

Honestly, sometimes its completely overwhelming. The rest of the time its simply ridiculous. Can any of you see what I mean? I'm ME! Not a "father"! I'm not a "dad". But I have to play that role now, and in my own house. Underneath, I'm still the same dork, idiot, genius, crank, etc... But I can't act like that anymore. Maybe thats for the better. I don't know. Unbelievable...

Nowhere basically... I just get lazy, apathetic, etc... I've had all sorts of things to write about, but I just keep forgetting, or I feel too tired, or I can't take the time away from work.

Ever since I moved, my life has been disrupted. I've been having difficulties sleeping, getting up, going to work, getting out of bed, eating (too much), and porn. Okay, thats not true. I mean, the getting out of bed part. No, I mean the porn part! Right kids?

Anyway, some really important and impotent topics have been brewing just below the surface, and they aren't ex-girlfriend or Hillary Duff rants. God, I do wish they were the same person though! I simply haven't had the time or energy to pull my shit together and do it.

So, when you stop by my page and see the same post front and center, I'm probably at home in bed, or on the couch, or eating on the couch, or at work, or eating at work. But I always come back. Eventually.

Last weekend I found out that David Crosby had been arrested for possession of marijuana and a handgun

I was really shocked by this.

Crosby "went clean" in 1986, and wrote an autobiography in 1988, Long Time Gone, which included lengthy passages about his drug addiction and recovery. Since that time, he has written a number of songs, two in particular, and a few others more generally, about his drug addiction. All told, I'd say that Crosby is (or was) one of the most famous recovered addicts in the world.

Granted, the guy never proselytized about the evils of drugs. He did, however, discuss his own experience. One of his very frequent concert comments went something along the lines of "I'm not going tell you that its wrong, and you shouldn't do it, but if you're thinking about doing drugs, take a look at my life".

That comment always struck me as a little odd actually. He was doing various drugs for over 20 years by the time he had to stop. During the late sixties, this guy was rich beyond belief, having all sorts of crazy sex and orgies, in the biggest rock band of the day, and simply living it up. And even after that, he was a functional addict. The last couple years were probably pretty terrible, but the majority of the time seemed like a good time.

And there haven't been too many interviews when the topic didn't come up, and he would say he was still clean. For instance, one of the most recent was in mid-February, during which he said, "I haven't been tempted by that stuff for 15 years. You get past it".

Of course, Crosby was arrested with possession of marijuana. That complicates things a little because marijuana is hardly freebase. However, Crosby is/was an addict, and if what we are all taught is true, then any drug use is VERY risky. However, maybe Crosby is one of the few people in the world that can indulge a little.

I'm pretty sure his opinions on pot were always fairly favorable. Even after his recovery, he didn't have anything bad to say about it. Coke was another matter. But he was soft on weed. He couldn't do it, but thought it was generally okay. Here is a comment from a recent interview:

I think those systems are still seriously misguided. Ah…. I think that the biggest single mistake that they’re making is marijuana. They’re wasting billions of dollars and millions of man hours of effort, from well intentioned people…. going after something they shouldn’t be and putting people in prison for something they shouldn’t be. That – if they didn’t do that they would (a), have the tax revenue from the marijuana; (b), the police department would have time to go after people who are a real threat; coke dealers, heroin dealers, you know violent crime.

I agree with that opinion. Pot is harmless for most people. I think some people can handle marijuana, and some people can't. But the same can be said about a lot of things that are perfectly legal

So what's going on here with Crosby? No one knows. Was he carrying, and not using? That seems ridiculous. Plus, the fact that Crosby CAN physically smoke it, even though he has had a liver transplant makes it seem more likely. In the same interview as above, he stated, "You know, pot is non-hepatotoxic, which means it doesn't go after your liver, which of course, booze obviously instantly, immediately and totally does." He actually brought that point up on his own.

I have heard that people don't live much longer than ten years on a transplanted liver. That means Crosby's time is almost up. Perhaps he decided that he likes pot and that it didn't make any difference if he smoked it now. I don't know.

I have heard a lot of comments from other recovering addicts, calling Crosby a hypocrit, and calling his actions unforgiveable, or simply expressing their concern about this development. Personally, I don't think there is any reason for this.

People, the celebrities and musicians we love so much are not our daddies, or our gods, or our role models, or our heroes. They are just people. They are people we don't know. They are people we don't know, who don't know (or care) that we exist.

Either way, I hope he doesn't go to jail. I'm looking forward to his next album.

UPDATE: Sun Mar 14, 12:13 AM
While I realize that pot is the least harmful of the many illegal (and occasionally legal) drugs, I don't think it's TOTALLY harmless. I know many people who do it or have done it, and don't consider themselves to have been harmed in anyway, which is fine. However, like most things, I tend to think that its okay in moderation, and disturbing in excess. I'm thinking of people that use for breakfast, throughout the day, when they get home from "work", and before they go to sleep. I'm thinking of people who "need" to do it. That is a psychological addiction. At the risk of overgeneralizing, I will state some observations. I have found that people that do a ton of weed are less reliable, less responsible, more forgetful, and more impulsive. I have also found that the younger you are when you start, the more of a problem it tends to be. Thats my experience of some of these people. However, it may be fine for them. It also seems that users only associate with other users. If one is more than a casual user, this makes sense. To summarize, I don't its the worst thing in the world. I don't think every weed smoker supports "terrorism". I don't think weed=crack. I do, however, think there are negative aspects to it.

I love depressing music. I'm drawn to it. It comforts me. I feel normal (relatively) when I hear it. I have been, and basically still am depressed. And I've been drawn to sad and depressing music that tends to fit my disposition, rather than trying to find music that would change my mood.

Crosby, Stills & Nash: Crosby, Stills & Nash IS depressing. Thats why I've loved them for so long. I LOVE depressing music. If you've only heard their popular songs, then Crosby, Stills & Nash seem pretty uplifting. You have "Teach Your Children", "Marrakesh Express", "Just A Song Before I Go", "Southern Cross", etc.. None of those songs are depressing. However, they've put out around 30 or so albums between the three of them. Most of the songs are pretty sad. Most are slow, quiet, with minor chords, and minor chord progressions. Their work since the late seventies has not been as depressing. They've all settled into life, matured, and just aren't as grim.

Neil Young: This guy is depressing. He's still putting out pretty depressing songs. Neil is just generally dark, and relentlessly so. Every so often, he'll have a light song, like "Harvest Moon", but even his more popular stuff, like "Heart Of Gold" isn't uplifting.

Beach Boys: Yes, the first three or so years of their career were pretty uplifting. But when Brian Wilson quit touring, and started to slip into mental illness, his music was simply... depressing. Almost all of his post 1964 songs involved themes of loss, regret, or sadness. And musically, the songs tended to reflect this. His last major work was "Til I Die", in 1971. This is the prettiest sounding, most depressing suicide song I know. Since then his output has been pretty scattershot and generally filtered through the haze of medication for schizophrenia and intense therapy.

John Lennon: This is obvious. After the Beatles, his songs were VERY down. Most of them were about Yoko, and usually his failings and fears with regard to her. His "comeback" in 1980 was mostly uplifting, but alongside his completed work, was a stack of demos that chronicalling his depression and unhappiness.

Others: Joni Mitchell, Jackson Browne, Pete Townshend (particularly solo, and late-Who), REM, The Smiths, George Harrison, J.D. Souther, Carole King.

I was perplexed by her. I always thought she should be nice. But she wasn't. She was not popular. She was on the fringes of the social situation at my high school. She dressed like a "punker", then she morphed into a "deadhead" in 11th grade. Once we got into a discussion about Crosby, Stills & Nash, and she said she didn't like them because they were "too depressing". Really, that said it all.

On this day, one year ago, I embarked upon one of the most thrilling, yet devastating and stupid misadventures of my life. It was the first day we went out. I had established contact with a girl I knew from high school. I had a crush on her in back then, but it was never anything significant. I was attracted to her, and I thought she was funny, but that is as far as it went. We simply didn't get along very well. She came off as arrogant and elitist. I sensed that she hated me....

Nevertheless, I was always intrigued (and somewhat repulsed)...

After high school, I rarely thought of her. Every so often she'd pop into my mind or someone would mention her. Thirteen years after graduation, I logged into Classmates.com and saw her name there. I emailed her, and then we began to communicate. She was living with her boyfriend, and had a 1 year old son. She seemed to have soften over the years. In email, she was quite enjoyable. We lost touch after a couple months of email. Then I emailed her again in February of last year. By this point she was single. We made plans to get together, and it was on this day, last year that it happened. Then we started dating, and so on and so on...

I have since decided that Classmates.com is evil. It exists only so the depressed and lonely people among us can further humiliate and torture themselves. Nuff said...

So, what IS the significance? Well, partially its simply a compulsive thing I have about remembering dates. Secondly, I can't get over how completely my life has changed since then. We dated for an intense and passionate 2 1/2 months. In that short period of time I decided that I loved her, was going to move in with her, was going to marry her, become the step-father to her child, and buy an investment property with her. During this period of time I also began to smoke weed, and began to drink regularly. The former was something I had never done (and have not done since), and the latter was a very rare event (which has gone back to being rare).

Essentially, I lost my mind. I acted like a 16 year old. But not just any 16 year old. I acted like an immature, naive, impetuous, impulsive, and irresponsible 16 year old. I was so completely caught up in this relationship that I quite nearly went insane. Insane? Yes, insane.

The relationship ended when I got cold feet about the investment property we were buying "together" (i.e. I was putting out 90% of the cash). In one week, I had determined that she was even more irresponsible and reckless than me. Around the time I started to sense that the relationship wasn't going to work, I began to get very anxious. Then I had 10 panic attacks in one weekend. 10? Yes, 10. The pinnacle of the "panic weekend" was on Friday night when we went out to celebrate her promotion. She wanted to go to a pretty expensive restaurant. I hated the food there, and I tried to order the least objectionable item. I ended up running to the bathroom and vomiting with loud wretches and heaving.

Over the next three weeks I proceeded to lose nearly twenty pounds due to a constant nausea. I took regular doses of Xanax to fend off more panic attacks. I poured through Cognitive Therapy textbooks and did all of the exercises repeatedly, trying to "cure" myself. In the end she broke up with me before I broke up with her, and in doing so, won my Worst Bitch Move Of 2003 award.

She said I was a "square", and so I am.